One of the joys of being a 'Burn'  is reading the stories and poetry written by various members of the family. Whether it be my grandfather Tom's poems or his  autobiographical 'Children of the Battleship's' or my father Grenville's light hearted outlook on the mundane things of life in his poetical follies, the reader is guaranteed a smile and a laugh which brightens the day whilst often also offering food for thought.

Below is a jovial poem written by Tom Burn.

 I'M STARTING MY DIET ON MONDAY

I'm starting my diet on Monday

I'll just have a treat for today

With just a few chocs, then seal up the box

And pack it securely away.

Today I will eat a good dinner

Have cream with my rice if I wish,

For tea I'll have ham with sponge cake and jam,

And supper will be chips with fish.

Oh yes, I was starting last Tuesday

But friends came to stay for the day.

I couldn't let them feel I was skipping a meal

So my diet hopes faded away.

On Wednesday my new resolution

Was strong and as firm as a rock

But then rushing round, by teatime I found

My knees were beginning to knock.

On Thursday and Friday I rested

With meals of the most usual kind

The family were pleased and nobody teased

But I know the strength of my mind.

With Saturday gone it's now Sunday,

Tomorrow I have to begin

No more stodgy pies, cream cakes or french fries

And all sweets will count as a sin.

Yes, I'm starting my diet on Monday

The scales have me frightened to death.

My dresses are tight, my shoes never right,

When walking I'm gasping for breath.

I must start my diet tomorrow

Of food please don't anyone speak

I know I'd be half a stone lighter

If only I'd started last week.